Fish................and................chips.

Can you make a statement that contains 5 consecutive ands with it making sense?

The owner of a Fish and Chip shop wanted a new sign over the shop. The signwriter wrote FISH and CHIPS. The owner looked at the resulting sign and said "There's too much space between fish and and and and and chips.

Tesco for bargains!!

I blame the maths teachers of the world!
People often ask why I taught maths, well....

IT'S THE ONLY SUBJECT THAT COUNTS

and

THERE'S SAFETY IN NUMBERS!

NATIONAL RECOGNITION!!!!

A write up in The Guardian (June 30 2009) under the title

HEATWAVE SURVIVAL GUIDE listed 8 "must visit" beach cafes stretching from Cornwall to North Yorkshire.

No surprise that STROLLERS was on this list!

Quintessentially English, you stroll into Babs and Rosie's cafe for a pot of tea, and their welcome has you staying all day or renting a chalet for the week. The beach is broad, there are jokes and fnar and fnar one liners printed on the menu and painted on the walls and fresh crab or egg mayo sandwiches to eat. A local treasure.

Glad I get a mention! ^

PIRATES AT STROLLERS!!!

Two Somali pirates, one wearing a very convincing John Cook mask, came ashore at Strollers on Sunday 28 June, Babs and Rosie were invited on board and unwittingly accepted the invitation. No sooner had they arrived on board than we received a 'phone call demanding 10 crab baguettes for their safe return. Lyn was left with no choice and the exchange was made and Babs and Rosie were, thankfully, safely returned. Whilst on board they were forced to drink a few glasses of Pimm's.

Cry Fowl!

I went into a restaurant and asked the waiter how he prepared the chickens, "I just tell them straight, you're going to die, and then we'll eat you"

Gardening tips.

Eleanor Roosevelt was flattered to find that a rose had been named after her ~ until she read the write up in a gardening magazine:

"NO GOOD IN A BED - BUT FINE AGAINST A WALL"

Pan Estate girl!

Overheard in Morrison's Newport:

Hi Sasha-Marie , I heard you've had another baby!

Yeh, that's five now - all boys.

What are their names?

I called 'em all Wayne.

What if you want one particular one?

I just add their surname!!!