Friday, 28 August 2009

One liners

I went to a restaurant that serves "Breakfast at anytime." so I ordered egg on toast during the Renaissance.
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I never drink water - look at the way it rusts pipes. ~ W C Fields.
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If you want the last word in an argument with your wife ~ just say "I think you're right dear."
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Better to keep your mouth shut and appear stupid, rather than to open it and remove all doubt. Mark Twain.
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There are only two sorts of exercise in Hollywood: jogging and helping a divorced friend move. Robert Wagner.
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Poms don't have that much imagination because they've pinched most of their street names from the Monopoly board. Paul Hogan.
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Old age isn't all that bad ~ when you consider the alternative. Maurice Chevalier.
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One of the few advantages to being an adult is that you can eat your dessert without finishing your vegetables. Lisa Alther (I haven't heard of her either!).
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If that's mink she's wearing then there is a rabbit somewhere living under an assumed name.
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Most people who are as witty, intelligent and as attractive as me are usually conceited. Joan Rivers
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Old McDonald was dyslexic, IEOIE
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This is the sort of English up with which I will not put. Winston Churchill.
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The insurance man told me I was insured for falling off the roof ~ but NOT for hitting the ground. Tommy Who Else Cooper.
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I only use my initiative when I'm asked to. Waitress at Strollers!
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You'll regret that to your dying day ~ if you live that long.
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I'm for a stronger death penalty. George Bush.
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About Me

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My first 21 years were in BRISTOL, Monks Park until I was 18, 3 years at Redland Teacher Training College then off to the bright lights of London for 10 years. Living in Horfield from the early 50s my dad took me to Eastville to watch the Rovers regularly, the first team mainly but often to see the reserves as well. I joined the supporters' club in the mid 60s and was membership secretary of the junior club, eventually taking over as chairman after the famous Gordon J Bennett left. In 1969 I moved to SE London to start my teaching career.I taught at Crown Woods, Eltham and Thomas Tallis in SE London and the next 27 years at Lake Middle School on the Isle of Wight. My main subject was mathematics and I taught a lot of PE concentrating mainly on football. Whilst in London I played football for Ramsgate, Faversham Town, Carshalton Athletic and Corinthian Casuals. My wife bought a half share in STROLLERS beach cafe in 2006 and I spend a lot of time with the customers. Viewing some of the pictures on this site will give you an idea of how I spend my leisure time.

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